Crickett's Journey (sfennui) wrote,
Crickett's Journey
sfennui

the long goodbye... or i guess the short one

i've been wrestling with this for a while, but i'm thinking it's time. my journal has been here a while now and it's odd, but i think i got more out of it with no friends list. you hit a point where too many people in real life know you or read your journal, and anyone who knows me in real life knows that being exposed and/or vulnerable is just not my best character trait. i thought it was therapuetic to write and haven't done a journal before, and it is but i'm not sure how much benefit i'm getting any more when everything is censored for x or y reasons and i fill this space with really trivial things lately.

i've definitely enjoyed it, and i'll probably even read and comment from time to time but i think this journal has run it's course and served what purpose it could serve.

i was going to leave comments to various people, but i guess that's part of the problem. it's too easy to distance myself from the real people that i give a shit about when i can say things here and just expect that they'll read them. hopefully i'll learn to say more of them to the people i care about, even the negative. think i'm getting a little better there.

it's been a bumpy year on this thing and in the real world, but now, while things are going really well, i think i'm going to step off the net and do what i can to really appreciate everything that comes along, even the storms and some things you just can't share appropriately with the rest of an anonymous world or audience without sacrificing a part of it somehow or making it less mine.

thanks to everyone for sharing the bits of their lives that i got to see, and with that i think it's time the curtain closed on this chapter. besides, it's a beautiful day and i think it's time to play in the sun rather than linger behind a screen. and somehow that feels nice.

luv and squishings to all

-crickett
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